My 3-year anniversary of no smoking/drinking

I cannot believe I can say this, but it has been 3 years since I stopped smoking. And basically just as long since I stopped drinking.

Back on February 28^th, 2011, I made a decision to try to stop smoking. Again. I was ALWAYS trying to stop. And ask anybody who has quit smoking and they’ll tell you, nicotine withdrawal is no fun. Not one bit. And in my lifetime I swear I’ve easily gone through nicotine withdrawal at least 70-80 times. If not more.

Nicotine withdrawal is a bitch, but after 3 or 4 days you’re in the clear and then it’s pretty easy to not smoke, they physical is over and it’s left to your own willpower. Plain and simple you just don’t smoke. We are all in charge of our lives and can do whatever we put our minds to. If I wanted to stop smoking I could.

And usually, this is how my attempts to quit would go: I’d go cold turkey and endure the headaches and the crankiness and the uneasiness inside my body (like an itch you can’t scratch), the anxiousness and the desire to just run screaming down the street. I’d drink water and pop advil and workout incessantly at the gym and eat really spicy food to help me push past it. And then I’d be fine. Day 4 of no smoking and it was like I was born anew.

But then on day 5 of no smoking I’d reward myself by going to happy hour. I figured after a week away from the bars cleaning out my system, that I deserved some celebratory booze. However, once I’d get a couple of vodka tonics in me, suddenly that strong will power of mine wasn’t so strong and my decision making skills weren’t as clear as they had been and I’d hazily bum a cigarette off of someone and the nicotine was back in my system all over again. Just my luck, it only takes one puff of a cigarette to reintroduce nicotine to your body and then you have to go through nicotine withdrawal all over again. If I wanted to stop smoking, I’d have to endure stupid withdrawal all over again.

I guess February 28^th, 2011 was different. Maybe it was how poor I felt my health was becoming that finally sealed the deal. After all I was living a conflicted life. I was the party boy who also wanted to be a gym rat. Those two lifestyles don’t mix too well. Like oil and water. It was pushing myself too far. I was wearing my body down.

Which is how the no drinking came into play.

As I smoked out my apartment window that Sunday evening in February, still hungover from a stupidly crazy weekend romping around gay New York, I decided that I had to do whatever it takes to stop smoking. That I needed to get serious.

And if you’ve ever read any of my previous blog posts you’ll know that I decided to go one month of no drinking to help me break the smoking habit. But then one month became three and then three became a year and a year became 16 months. I went 16 months of being stone-cold sober. I didn’t have alcohol or cigarettes or any other chemical substances of any kind. The strongest thing I had had by June of 2012 was a potent cup of coffee and a lot of doughnuts.

In the last year and a half since June 2012, I’ve gotten drunk a handful of times. But it’s not been without consequence. I cleaned out my system too well and now alcohol does not agree with me. If I drink I’m hungover the next day and then I’m sick the following three. It’s a lot like nicotine withdrawal – the same type of crankiness, the same time of discomfort and irritation. In other words, it’s not fun.

So I don’t drink anymore either. Accomplishing both of those things was not easy. In fact, accomplishing both of those feats was probably the most challenging thing I’ve ever done in my entire life.  But I’m glad I did. Stopping smoking was great, stopping drinking has been even greater. To say it was the single best thing to ever happen to me would be an understatement. I know it seems extreme to some people, but I wouldn’t trade in the clear head, or abundant energy or hangover-free mornings for anything. And then there’s the money I’ve saved! Just for fun I tallied up what I’ve saved by not smoking for the last three years. It turned out to be around six thousand dollars. I imagine drinking would easily surpass that.

All that to say, if there’s a something I’ve learned over the last three years that I can pass along: if you are trying to accomplish something, whether it be to stop smoking, or to improve your health, or to be a happier person, the method to achieve that goal is simple: do whatever it takes. If you’re trying to fix something about yourself and you find yourself faltering over and over and over again, pinpoint the one thing that’s screwing you up and take it out of the equation. Like deciding to stop drinking during my attempt to stop smoking. You are in charge of your life, your emotions, your destiny, not the other way around. There are friends and family and partners and support groups and books and personal trainers and life coaches and countless resources at our fingertips. The only thing that is holding you back from doing something is you.

Easier said than done, I know. It’s the age old saying: “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” Whatever you're trying to accomplish, keep on trying until it sticks. Because nobody likes a quitter (unless it’s someone who’s quit smoking).

So today, March 1^st, 2014, I celebrate making decisions that have changed my life. I will take deep breaths, smile and toast to my achievement with a nice tall glass of seltzer water.